Hello! I am so thrilled that there are so many new faces here, thanks to Olivia’s post that featured my desk tour! This Substack is exactly what it sounds like: something I’m reading, thoughts on writing, a rant, and a recommendation. I’m so glad you’re here!
Reading
I love traditional craft books, but the longer I write, the more I believe that so much of being a writer (or a creative human in any form) is about bringing your whole self to your art. I frequently tell my students that every time we read, we bring our own lives, thoughts, and experiences to the story, and the same is true when we write. One book that’s helped me consider these aspects of who I am when it comes to writing is Laraine Herring’s brilliant book, Writing Begins With The Breath. The subtitle is “Embodying Your Authentic Voice” and the book aims to both connect you with that voice, and to understand how it’s affecting your work. What I love about it is that while there are gems of wisdom on every page, the end of each chapter has suggestions for movement practices, writing prompts, and other ways to connect with your body and spirit. I’ve learned so much about myself from considering these prompts.
Writing
This past weekend, I had a mini solo writing retreat. I am easily distracted when I am at home, and I have multiple projects going right now, so I have felt disconnected from my own brain and ideas. I decided a few nights away would be helpful to get some solid focus on what I need to work on. I would be remiss not to acknowledge the financial and “time” privilege I have. I can afford a hotel, I have a spouse who will watch our dogs and take care of things at home, and I have no children. I know I have a lot of things stacked in my favor. That said, if you’re looking for a way to get into your own brain and WRITE, free of chores and snuggling dogs and the laziness of an afternoon at home, here are my tips for a successful solo writing retreat:
Don’t go too far away.
I know, this seems counterintuitive, but truly, don’t waste writing time on driving time. This retreat is not aimed at checking out a new city or exploring. I’ve done trips where that was the focus and a way of refreshing my brain so I could write, and they were awesome, but if I’m looking to get writing done, I want to be close to home so I can maximize my time. I’m talking 30 minutes away, tops.
Don’t pick a bougie hotel. Instead, opt for one that has a desk.
I love a fancy hotel, and I have fancy taste for most trips. That said, many pricey hotels have small-ish rooms or no place to write (this is not a complaint — they also have fancy bathrooms and great products and are stylish and Instagrammable!). For this, I booked a “suite” (not really a suite) at an extended-stay type hotel so I would have space to spread out and work. It’s clean, it’s dated, it’s wholly uninteresting, which is precisely what I need when I’m working.
Get a place with a fridge.
I need snacks, meals, and a rude amount of beverage options. DoorDashing every meal feels ridiculous, and if I leave my hotel room multiple times a day to eat, there’s no telling how much time I will waste. Instead, I went to Trader Joe’s, got $45 worth of food and beverages, and stocked myself for the weekend. This also means that I can be mildly feral and ignore the clock, and eat whenever the urge strikes. Pro tip: get some things with protein (I got spring rolls with tofu, yogurts, pb pretzels, and some cheese) so you don’t crash.
Make a playlist.
I made a long playlist for my weekend. Not only does making a playlist make just about everything feel special and fun, I also packed it with songs I associate with the projects I’m working on, as well as some instrumental songs for focusing.
Select some priorities, but also be open to magic.
When I’ve done these little mini trips before, I’ve had ambitious goals for what I’m going to accomplish, only to find that I feel excited to work on something else or bored with a project or stuck on what I’ve intended. I try to go in with a loose plan but also a lot of options for what to do.
Pack judiciously.
I am a cozy girl, so all I brought were sweats and tank tops. I refuse to wear hard pants or a confining bra while I’m engaging in intense work, and I highly recommend it.
Bring some little treats.
I don’t mean food. I like to take a Big Shower before I go, but I also packed a scented shower steamer, a face mask, and some good lotion. Work should not be all torture!
Remember: a lot of writing is actually not writing.
I like to use these trips as a little check-in for myself. What is feeling good in my routine? What am I excited about? What is making me feel less-than-ideal right now? Are there things I want to research? Giving my brain breaks feels essential, and I think that when you’re creative, you’re usually creating even when you’re not. Let your obsessions guide you, and engage with what Kate Wilhelm calls (in this wonderful piece by Kelly Link) your “Silent Partner.” Follow those weird obsessions and let them fill your well and brain with new ideas and the things you want to chase.
Let whatever happen, happens.
One of the first times I did this, quarantine had just ended during the pandemic. When I got to the hotel, I realized it was the first time I’d been in a place that was not my house for a long, long time. I stayed in the room and mostly stared at the wall and journaled and tried to make sense of what was happening in the world. I felt so guilty when I left because I didn’t have “proof” that I’d done something. But when I got home, I felt refreshed and productive. It’s okay if things don’t look the way you expected them to.
Ranting
I watched Love Is Blind Season 6, and…wow. As someone who has not watched since Season 1, I’d forgotten how hellishly chaotic the people on this show are. A friend of mine likes to describe people who are kind of awful as “crying out for healing” and I think I’d contribute to a GoFundMe to most of the male contestants, and a few of the gals. Another one calls it “Oh No! Heteros!” and that feels accurate. I am dying for the reunion tonight.
Recommending
These are delicious. Like…I can’t get enough. Trader Joe’s is so good and these are dangerously good. If you like chocolate and enjoy the very end of the Hold The Cone or a Drumstick, then you will love these.
1. I can’t wait for YOUR cozy writing book. These retreat tips are 🔥🔥Sign me up for the preorder.
2. How do I get my hands on that Spotify playlist?!
I've thought about a weekend writing retreat so many times, but I've never thought about what it would actually look like, or what I'd do once there. I had no idea how much I needed this breakdown! TY!!